i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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