McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
