Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
