did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
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