Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
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