oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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