"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
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