Three words: puerto rican gang bang
It's Friday. Sex?
You can't special order awesome
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I need water and some morals
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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