Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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