did you get engaged???
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Randomize
