I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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