Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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