you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
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