Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
