The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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