I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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