She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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