How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
