I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize