oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize