I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
