I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
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