all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize
