ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
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