Me. At least after what I've been through.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
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