STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Randomize
