I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize