2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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