Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
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