worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
