Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
In other news, I just burned my penis
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
