i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Randomize
