so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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