Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Randomize
