we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
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Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I'm just crazy horny about you
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
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I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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