But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
