NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
