Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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