i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
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