My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dignity is for republicans.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize