You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
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