i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
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