I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
