What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
