well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Everyone says I win the strip club
The struggles of a small town man whore
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize