Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Randomize
