You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
