69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
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