I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Still dying that you shit outside
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize