just come out here and I will go home with you...
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
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