Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
